🍕 Pineapple, Anchovies, and the Pizza Identity Crisis

Let’s settle this once and for all — or more likely stir the pot enough to keep the debate delicious.

Pizza is sacred. Pizza is personal. And pizza is wildly controversial when it comes to toppings. I once worked with a guy from the NYC area who insisted on cheese only. No pepperoni. No sausage. No veggies. Just cheese. From the land of foldable slices and corner pizzerias, that felt like sacrilege. But hey — to each their own.

So what’s the deal with pineapple, anchovies, and other “questionable” toppings? And how do regional styles play into this culinary chaos?

🍍 Pineapple: The Sweet Rebel

Invented in Canada by Greek immigrant Sam Panopoulos in the 1960s, Hawaiian pizza was never meant to start a war — just a flavor experiment. But a full frontal conflict it did become. Presidents have weighed in. Twitter has exploded. Iceland’s president once joked about banning it entirely.

Pros:

• Sweet/savory contrast works well with ham or chicken.
• Caramelizes beautifully when baked.
• Loved by millions — even if they won’t admit it.

Cons:

• “Fruit doesn’t belong on pizza!” (unless it’s tomato, apparently). Yes, technically the tomato is a fruit not a veggie.
• Texture clash for some purists.
• Often used as shorthand for culinary heresy.

🐟 Anchovies: The Salty Underdog

Anchovies don’t get the same hate — maybe because they’re quietly divisive. They’re salty, oily, and unapologetically fishy. Some love the umami punch. Others recoil at the idea of “pizza with eyes.”

Pros:

• Bold flavor for adventurous eaters.
• Classic in Naples and Rome.
• Pairs well with olives, capers, and garlic.

Cons:

• Overpowering if not balanced.
• Rarely ordered — even pizza joints quietly drop them from menus.
• Makes pineapple look tame.

🧀 Cheese-Only: The Minimalist’s Manifesto

Is cheese-only pizza bland? Or is it the perfect canvas?

For some, it’s nostalgic. For others, it’s a missed opportunity. But in NYC, where the crust and sauce are the stars, a plain slice is practically a rite of passage.

🗺️ Regional Styles: Where You’re From Might Decide What You Top

Each region has its own rules — and rebels. Just don’t ask a New Yorker to eat deep-dish with a fork unless you want a lecture.

 

🗣️ Final Slice: What’s Your Pizza Personality?

I may be against pineapple on pizza — but I’m also against pineapple on burgers, so maybe I’m not the best judge. What I do know is this: pizza is meant to be shared, argued over, and enjoyed.

So tell me:

• Are you Team Pineapple or Team Anchovy?
• Do you fold your slice or fork your deep-dish?
• What’s the weirdest topping you’ve ever loved?

Drop a comment, tag a pizza purist, or share your favorite slice story. Just don’t bring grapes to the party — yes, that’s a thing now